Post by Luka Green on Aug 21, 2015 2:25:37 GMT -5
(OOC: Stats pref, wisdom pref)
There had been a lot of anger in Luka when he realized he was going to be at this hellhole for another half a year, at least. The credit he needed was even ridiculous, who in the hell decided to shift the credit allocation like that in the middle of his sophomore year without telling him? As a result one of his junior classes didn’t count toward the humanities credit he needed for state requirements for graduation and he now had to take a single humanities course to graduate. He had above and beyond every other credit but not a single one could be moved without upsetting the balance. It was bogus!
He was taking the course all the same, deciding to take other classes to fill up his schedule so he’d at least have a challenge, though most of those classes he was a TA for. The only problem was that he had been advised by his counselor, the one who fucked up, the one who Luka lost his temper with and managed to insult into a depressive swing, to take an anger management class. He didn’t, he opted for an alternative that would suit him better. A combination Hot Yoga/Meditation class. It was a class that he had been advised would help him and also perhaps aid with other bodily functions.
When preparing for the class/club, whichever it technically was considering it was extracurricular, he made a point to do everything they had advised including going on a cleanse. He managed with the lemon juice, water, and cayenne pepper mixture and thought it had been a rough week the cleanse had done it’s job. He was not starved, but he had definitely felt himself getting a little thinner during the process, not a result he wanted considering how deprived his body had already been. Plus that stuff always gave you the runs and he could seriously do without those.
“Listen,” He said as he approached his instructor, holding up his form to mark whether or not he had done the steps preparing himself physically, mentally and emotionally for a long in depth first session. “I have a number of bodily disorders that I’ve listed on my form. All my medications are at the nurse’s office. If anything happens call the nurse directly, okay?”
”It’ll go just fine, believe it. This’ll help you.”
“Yeah, I mean everybody has been saying that my whole life and it hasn’t. I’m here to get the P so that I can just never have to worry about my counselor again, you know?” He practically shoved the sheet in the woman’s hands before turning and seeing the group before him sitting at their yoga mats. He stretched himself out a little bit before making his way over and having a seat cross legged at the yoga mat. He took off his shoes and socks like the others had done, he was wearing a pair of sweatpants and a tank top. The look was definitely nothing that he was comfortable with because he liked to wear layers and go with a certain style unless it was a really good v neck, but he just went along with the uniform suggested for now. They weren’t yoga pants but he didn’t feel like shelling out the cash unless he could find ones that said ‘JUICY’ across the butt.
He joined the group in a sense, following with the motions that they were doing, getting used to taking in everything around him and even going so far as to try and meditate while doing the yoga. The closest he got was a near hypnotism that might have been brought on from hunger, the heat, and the smell of the incense that was filling the place with the smell of patchouli. He did notice tingles up along his spine and being more in the moment however. Instead of time glazing over he actually was aware of his toes, his fingertips, every ache in his back, every stretch of his shoulders, neck, and spine. Every lungful of air was like life entering his body, and every exhale had been like expunging his body from any sort of pollutants. Of course, at a certain point they had gone from the yoga and stretching to actually meditating. The first step was a guided meditation. When it came to this part there was a lot of focus that Luka had to put into his motions and his movements. He sat and slowly acknowledged his toes, his feet, his ankles. The focus of his body moved upward along his calves to his knees, along his thighs to his groin, at this point there was a noticeable, “Heh.” in the class followed by at least three people having to cover their mouths.
Luka was the one who said ‘heh’.
The focus shifted to hips, until the energy that he was focusing on was focused in his gut. He felt it radiate through there and transfer upward to his chest, expanding and spilling out into his veins, stretching out and branching off along his forearms, down to his wrist, along his fingertips, up along his shoulders, up the back of his spine, crawling up along his neck, and along his jawline, his lips, cheeks, along the bridge of his nose, over his eyelids, across his eyebrows, and to the very point of his hairline.
They practiced picturing this energy going into them, and then they imagined this energy taking on a white likeness. As they accessed and felt this energy in their bodies they pictured a safe haven, a comforting place that they constructed within their minds. In Luka’s mind this was a place that resembled ancient greece, with white pillars holding up great white buildings. Marble stone structures around him and a great deal of scrolls and books available to him. In this place every book was blank, not as a negative thing but as a positive. It represented the world of knowledge he still hadn’t reached, all the information he had yet to gather.
He yearned to fill it, but the journey ahead sated him, comforted him as he thought about it in rest. He grabbed one of the books, imagining it being his next one to fill out, and held it tight to his chest. As he continued to breathe he smelled the familiar smell of moldy paper, the smell of libraries. This book was old, ancient even, and with that smell came a sense of old spirits. He imagined that many great minds descended from their rest to join him. Not to say anything, but circling him and watching him, observing him. Not in a judgmental way but rather in a welcoming way. They were curious about him. These great, powerful minds were curious about him.
That had been his place, and it was his alone to enjoy and to find comfort in. It was told to him in this guided meditation that he should put a feeling to this place, a way to access it again in times when he was struggling. He could go and the familiar faces would be there waiting for him, inviting him into his den of safety and security. They would protect him while he recharged his energies and was comforted by their company. He would have access to the book to hold in his arms and hold tight to his chest, told he would be able to smell the mold and the dust from the old pages. He would be able to walk along the white pillars and marble statues. This place had been his haven and would continue to be as long as he needed it. He attached a feeling of serenity to it, a sense of breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth with his eyes shut his and his head tilted ever so slightly up. His hands on his knees, his elbows relaxed, his chest raised.
The guided meditation was brought back to the room. There was a ten minute break where he was able to get up and move around. He chose this time to drink some water, visit the restroom, and get a moment to go outside and sneak a few puffs from a cigarette he had been saving for this occasion. Once the teacher gave a heads up that the course would be continuing now, he quickly outed it, taking another drink of water and hurrying back in to learn more about meditation. The teacher instructed them that she would put on some very low volume mild sounds, just ambient noises from an ocean soundtrack of sorts. She dimmed the lights and had them go freestyle with their meditation for a bit, no longer guided by focusing on their own.
Luka put headphones in. He was all for the ocean sounds but the truth was that the breathing and the excess movement from people shifting and finding it hard to sit still for so long had been disruptive to his process of relaxation. He laid down rather than sit up. He draped his right hand over his naval with his phone in hand. His other arm was resting under his head to cushion his position. He had a knee raised up and was breathing in slowly through his nose, out through his mouth softly and quietly as the icelandic ambient music played.
The imagery this music called up was far different than the first place he had imagined. The first thing he saw was forests, trees with large amounts of moss, nursing logs that supported several forms of plant life, snags with small little reservoirs of water in the hollowed out center for birds to bathe in. He saw clearings with high grass and fields in the bright sun. He felt the earth on his bare feet, he smelled the petrichor as it began to rain softly. He noted the subtle change in temperature and the cool chill that the breeze brought. He imagined all of this, and saw it in his mind.
He found his body was still relaxed as he saw all of this and kept going. The clearing lead to a more heavily forested area with rougher lower canopy paths. Broken branches and twigs were rough under his bare feet. His toes twitched in the room as he imagined the rough feeling against his skin, the bark and the lichen pressed hard as he crunched it. He knew the air here was pure based on how much lichen there had been on the trees and the type of lichen at that. He was able to trail his fingers along the bark of an old growth tree, able to look up and see a stream making it’s way down between the trees.
He walked over in this place, sitting and letting his fingers dangle in the water. Here under the cover of trees the rain barely touched him, but the stream felt just as ice cold as he imagined it might. The cool wet sensation on his fingers brought shivers along his spine. He imagined these trees and their roots extending far into the world, deeper than he could imagine. Deeper than the greatest depths of the oceans. He imagined these roots going through the crust of the earth and through it’s layers into the center. He imagined the root tips drawing energy from the earth and bearing fruit on the surface from that energy. He imagined the roots extending into his chest, into his heart, and bearing fruit from his body.
In this he garnered that what there was in the depths of his heart was what fruit was bore on the outside. There would be no tricking the world, it would know his heart by the very fruit he bore from his actions. He thought about this as he remembered yelling at his Counsellor and felt a ping of shame. His eyes opened as he pulled his ear buds out. Several of the students had simply fallen asleep. Two were playing cards in the corner, but he had been the only one consciously meditating and imagining himself in that situation he had been in. He approached the teacher.
”So, you need me to call the nurse?”
“No, I’m fine. I just need to go eat I think.”
”You pass, with flying colors. You even stayed awake, good job.”
“Yeah, thanks.” He said, leaving with the knowledge that he had a place to return to to feel safe, and a place to go if he sought more wisdom.
There had been a lot of anger in Luka when he realized he was going to be at this hellhole for another half a year, at least. The credit he needed was even ridiculous, who in the hell decided to shift the credit allocation like that in the middle of his sophomore year without telling him? As a result one of his junior classes didn’t count toward the humanities credit he needed for state requirements for graduation and he now had to take a single humanities course to graduate. He had above and beyond every other credit but not a single one could be moved without upsetting the balance. It was bogus!
He was taking the course all the same, deciding to take other classes to fill up his schedule so he’d at least have a challenge, though most of those classes he was a TA for. The only problem was that he had been advised by his counselor, the one who fucked up, the one who Luka lost his temper with and managed to insult into a depressive swing, to take an anger management class. He didn’t, he opted for an alternative that would suit him better. A combination Hot Yoga/Meditation class. It was a class that he had been advised would help him and also perhaps aid with other bodily functions.
When preparing for the class/club, whichever it technically was considering it was extracurricular, he made a point to do everything they had advised including going on a cleanse. He managed with the lemon juice, water, and cayenne pepper mixture and thought it had been a rough week the cleanse had done it’s job. He was not starved, but he had definitely felt himself getting a little thinner during the process, not a result he wanted considering how deprived his body had already been. Plus that stuff always gave you the runs and he could seriously do without those.
“Listen,” He said as he approached his instructor, holding up his form to mark whether or not he had done the steps preparing himself physically, mentally and emotionally for a long in depth first session. “I have a number of bodily disorders that I’ve listed on my form. All my medications are at the nurse’s office. If anything happens call the nurse directly, okay?”
”It’ll go just fine, believe it. This’ll help you.”
“Yeah, I mean everybody has been saying that my whole life and it hasn’t. I’m here to get the P so that I can just never have to worry about my counselor again, you know?” He practically shoved the sheet in the woman’s hands before turning and seeing the group before him sitting at their yoga mats. He stretched himself out a little bit before making his way over and having a seat cross legged at the yoga mat. He took off his shoes and socks like the others had done, he was wearing a pair of sweatpants and a tank top. The look was definitely nothing that he was comfortable with because he liked to wear layers and go with a certain style unless it was a really good v neck, but he just went along with the uniform suggested for now. They weren’t yoga pants but he didn’t feel like shelling out the cash unless he could find ones that said ‘JUICY’ across the butt.
He joined the group in a sense, following with the motions that they were doing, getting used to taking in everything around him and even going so far as to try and meditate while doing the yoga. The closest he got was a near hypnotism that might have been brought on from hunger, the heat, and the smell of the incense that was filling the place with the smell of patchouli. He did notice tingles up along his spine and being more in the moment however. Instead of time glazing over he actually was aware of his toes, his fingertips, every ache in his back, every stretch of his shoulders, neck, and spine. Every lungful of air was like life entering his body, and every exhale had been like expunging his body from any sort of pollutants. Of course, at a certain point they had gone from the yoga and stretching to actually meditating. The first step was a guided meditation. When it came to this part there was a lot of focus that Luka had to put into his motions and his movements. He sat and slowly acknowledged his toes, his feet, his ankles. The focus of his body moved upward along his calves to his knees, along his thighs to his groin, at this point there was a noticeable, “Heh.” in the class followed by at least three people having to cover their mouths.
Luka was the one who said ‘heh’.
The focus shifted to hips, until the energy that he was focusing on was focused in his gut. He felt it radiate through there and transfer upward to his chest, expanding and spilling out into his veins, stretching out and branching off along his forearms, down to his wrist, along his fingertips, up along his shoulders, up the back of his spine, crawling up along his neck, and along his jawline, his lips, cheeks, along the bridge of his nose, over his eyelids, across his eyebrows, and to the very point of his hairline.
They practiced picturing this energy going into them, and then they imagined this energy taking on a white likeness. As they accessed and felt this energy in their bodies they pictured a safe haven, a comforting place that they constructed within their minds. In Luka’s mind this was a place that resembled ancient greece, with white pillars holding up great white buildings. Marble stone structures around him and a great deal of scrolls and books available to him. In this place every book was blank, not as a negative thing but as a positive. It represented the world of knowledge he still hadn’t reached, all the information he had yet to gather.
He yearned to fill it, but the journey ahead sated him, comforted him as he thought about it in rest. He grabbed one of the books, imagining it being his next one to fill out, and held it tight to his chest. As he continued to breathe he smelled the familiar smell of moldy paper, the smell of libraries. This book was old, ancient even, and with that smell came a sense of old spirits. He imagined that many great minds descended from their rest to join him. Not to say anything, but circling him and watching him, observing him. Not in a judgmental way but rather in a welcoming way. They were curious about him. These great, powerful minds were curious about him.
That had been his place, and it was his alone to enjoy and to find comfort in. It was told to him in this guided meditation that he should put a feeling to this place, a way to access it again in times when he was struggling. He could go and the familiar faces would be there waiting for him, inviting him into his den of safety and security. They would protect him while he recharged his energies and was comforted by their company. He would have access to the book to hold in his arms and hold tight to his chest, told he would be able to smell the mold and the dust from the old pages. He would be able to walk along the white pillars and marble statues. This place had been his haven and would continue to be as long as he needed it. He attached a feeling of serenity to it, a sense of breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth with his eyes shut his and his head tilted ever so slightly up. His hands on his knees, his elbows relaxed, his chest raised.
The guided meditation was brought back to the room. There was a ten minute break where he was able to get up and move around. He chose this time to drink some water, visit the restroom, and get a moment to go outside and sneak a few puffs from a cigarette he had been saving for this occasion. Once the teacher gave a heads up that the course would be continuing now, he quickly outed it, taking another drink of water and hurrying back in to learn more about meditation. The teacher instructed them that she would put on some very low volume mild sounds, just ambient noises from an ocean soundtrack of sorts. She dimmed the lights and had them go freestyle with their meditation for a bit, no longer guided by focusing on their own.
Luka put headphones in. He was all for the ocean sounds but the truth was that the breathing and the excess movement from people shifting and finding it hard to sit still for so long had been disruptive to his process of relaxation. He laid down rather than sit up. He draped his right hand over his naval with his phone in hand. His other arm was resting under his head to cushion his position. He had a knee raised up and was breathing in slowly through his nose, out through his mouth softly and quietly as the icelandic ambient music played.
The imagery this music called up was far different than the first place he had imagined. The first thing he saw was forests, trees with large amounts of moss, nursing logs that supported several forms of plant life, snags with small little reservoirs of water in the hollowed out center for birds to bathe in. He saw clearings with high grass and fields in the bright sun. He felt the earth on his bare feet, he smelled the petrichor as it began to rain softly. He noted the subtle change in temperature and the cool chill that the breeze brought. He imagined all of this, and saw it in his mind.
He found his body was still relaxed as he saw all of this and kept going. The clearing lead to a more heavily forested area with rougher lower canopy paths. Broken branches and twigs were rough under his bare feet. His toes twitched in the room as he imagined the rough feeling against his skin, the bark and the lichen pressed hard as he crunched it. He knew the air here was pure based on how much lichen there had been on the trees and the type of lichen at that. He was able to trail his fingers along the bark of an old growth tree, able to look up and see a stream making it’s way down between the trees.
He walked over in this place, sitting and letting his fingers dangle in the water. Here under the cover of trees the rain barely touched him, but the stream felt just as ice cold as he imagined it might. The cool wet sensation on his fingers brought shivers along his spine. He imagined these trees and their roots extending far into the world, deeper than he could imagine. Deeper than the greatest depths of the oceans. He imagined these roots going through the crust of the earth and through it’s layers into the center. He imagined the root tips drawing energy from the earth and bearing fruit on the surface from that energy. He imagined the roots extending into his chest, into his heart, and bearing fruit from his body.
In this he garnered that what there was in the depths of his heart was what fruit was bore on the outside. There would be no tricking the world, it would know his heart by the very fruit he bore from his actions. He thought about this as he remembered yelling at his Counsellor and felt a ping of shame. His eyes opened as he pulled his ear buds out. Several of the students had simply fallen asleep. Two were playing cards in the corner, but he had been the only one consciously meditating and imagining himself in that situation he had been in. He approached the teacher.
”So, you need me to call the nurse?”
“No, I’m fine. I just need to go eat I think.”
”You pass, with flying colors. You even stayed awake, good job.”
“Yeah, thanks.” He said, leaving with the knowledge that he had a place to return to to feel safe, and a place to go if he sought more wisdom.
