Post by Hemera/Nyka Day on Feb 9, 2016 19:11:49 GMT -5
(OOC: This thread may be a trigger for those who read it. Involved will be drugs, alcohol, and self-deprecation. Again, this may be a trigger for those who read this. Continue with caution.)
She was death walking. From the outside, she appeared upkept. On the inside, her mind was numb, a barrage of questions and self-doubt attacking her nonstop. For the past few weeks, the thoughts had gotten worse, more depressing, more self-deprecating. It was sickening, but Hemera couldn't stop it. Nyka wasn't helping either. She kept adding her voice to the others, pointing out the flaws in her character, her strength....
'What friends do you have here? Who's actually going to listen to you and take you serious? You have no status here! You're a nobody. Nothing.'
Hemera kept walking, one foot in front of the other. A rattling could be heard in her pocket and in her hand was a paper bag clenched tightly. She had no idea where she was going. A cursory look simply told her that she had no idea where she was. She was better off in an alley somewhere, dead.
'Nobody wants anything to do with you. I don't even think that they know about you!' Nyka laughed and the sound reverberated through her skull. 'Do you really think that anybody wants anything to do with a weakling like you? If it wasn't for me, you would have died a long
time ago.'
"Shut up," Hemera whispered. The voices were growing ever louder, bouncing around with nowhere to go. Again and again the echoes came, driving her further down her mental rabbit hole. It wasn't as cold today, it seemed. She had pulled on some flared jeans and a bright pink tank top before she had left home, matching it with her combat boots. She had hoped the color would help some. What a funny thought that was, now that she thought about it.
Turning a corner, she was met with an open area that she assumed to be a small park. There was a fountain running in the center of it all, surrounded by benches and a few trees. A doggie bag station stood lonely amongst it all, a solitary bag waving at her as she passed it by. She threw herself onto a bench and lay down, loose hair mixing with the dirt on the ground. Again, Nyka spoke.
'What do you think you're going to do, sweet cheeks? Just ignore it all?'
"If that's what it takes, yeah," Hemera said out loud this time. She just wanted them all to go away for a while. Just a little bit. She wasn't ready for death. She was ready for relief. She sat up and pulled the neck of the hidden bottle from the bag and make quick work of the screw-on top. A quick swig later and she could feel the burn rushing down her throat. Tequila was her go to drink of the day. She reached in her pocket and pulled out the bottle of non-descriptive pills. They had been obtained when was running with her crew back then. The label had faded and could no longer be read by anyone. All she knew was she kept them in cases like this. Popping that top, she tipped it up and allowed a few pills to fall on her waiting tongue, only to be washed down with more tequila.
You're nothing....you'll never be anything...why do you even train? You haven't helped anyone. You can't fight. You think you do, but you don't. You deceive everyone around. You haven't even mentioned Nyka. You're ashamed of who you are, what you've become.
Another round of pills and liquor. She stared at the flowing fountain as the water cascaded from entrance to the pool below.
You should have been there with them. You shouldn't have survived. You should have died with your family. You should have died with your family.
Queue another round. Her foot slowly started tapping against the soft ground. Her brows furrowed in frustration. She just couldn't get them to go away.
What will you amount to? What will you help with in this new district? You're better off hiding from everything and everyone, tucking your tail between your legs like the dog that you are.
Round after round went until she was all out of the colored pills. Disgusted, she threw the bottle to the side and took a long drag out of the tequila bottle. How much did she have to take? How long did she have to endure this before she grew numb?
Not long after the thought, she could feel her nose and face begin to grow numb. Ah.....there we go. Finally, some relief. She sat back and threw her gaze to the sky. The sun had begun to set, it's rays throwing rose and orange colors throughout the vast expanse. The shadows had grown since she'd been here. How long had she been there for?
Another long drag.
What was her purpose here? What was she going to do here? She couldn't very well survive any longer on her own like this. She did have shelter, but what was she going to do for food? She shook her head viciously and looked straight up into the sky, resting an arm along the back of the wooden bench. Where would she go? She didn't have any friends here. She'd met Ayden and others, but she couldn't classify them as friends. Not yet at least. Hardly any of them had spoken to the poor, pitiful girl with snowy hair. Maybe she really was pathetic. Maybe she was a hindrance on society.
This time she pulled the bottle up and chugged it for a good ten seconds. That burn really did feel nice. She could feel her fingers and toes becoming numb now. Her extremities felt heavy, limp. It was then she heard a noise to her side and looked back down in that direction. Her vision was becoming blurred as well.
Standing there were a group of five, three males and two females. As they came out of the shadows, she could see various items being held. A pipe, some knives, a broken bottle...
"Hey chickie, how come you're all alone out here? Don't you know it's dangerous to be alone?" one of the guys called out, smirking. The group began their advance on her and Hemera put her bottle on the ground, moving to stand, only to grasp at the bench for support.
"Is it really any of your goddamn business why I'm out here, punk?" Hemera answered. She had begun to revert back to her old ways, back to the days in her thieving crew. This wasn't really a good time for fight, she knew it. She'd just have to hold out until they decided to leave. She took a deep breath and stood on her own, focusing on what was to come.
"You think you can talk to him that way?" said one of the girls, a defiant tone in her voice. "Do you know who he is, bitch?"
"I don't really care who he is, slut, but you better back off." Hemera began to crouch and immediately she could feel the effects of the drugs she'd put in her system. Her reflexes would be sluggish, her ability to watch their movements would be slowed...she wasn't in a good spot right now. The girl that had spoken spit on the ground and began to walk away from the ground towards her. Good. If she could fight them one on one, she had a chance.
As the girl grew closer, Hemera took her chances. She ran at the girl to gain momentum and surprise took over the girl's face. As she got closer, Hemera slid, taking the girl down with her and quickly climbed on top of her, delivering a swift right hook her face. Over and over she did this until she was certain the girl was down. She stood up and looked towards the group. Judging by their faces, they were pissed. Uh oh.
As Hemera tried to regroup, the rest of the flock attacked. The pipe connected with her shoulder, throwing her off balance and onto the ground. As she tried to scramble upwards, she was pinned by the others and she closed her eyes. So this was how it was going to end, huh? Still she struggled, pulling her upper body off the ground only to get it stomped on by someone's foot. A sharp pain tore across her face and she could feel a slow liquid begin to well and fall down her cheek. Someone grabbed her face and turned it to look at them. It was the first guy that had spoken, a grin lining his features. He looked like he hadn't taken care of himself in weeks...didn't smell like it either.
"How are you going to get out of this one, bitch?" He pulled a fist back and slammed it against her temple, head ricocheting back only to connect with the ground. Stars lined her vision and it dimmed. This really wasn't good. Looking back up, she directed a murderous gaze at the male and spit at his face.
"Do what you want. I won't let you do it willingly. You've got to fight for your victory."
Anger took over his face and he stepped off of her, saying, "Destroy her." After that, the only thing Hemera knew was pain. Kicks were directed at her, connecting with her abdomen and chest, slices were being made along her body. A few punches were mingled in with it all. Until finally, the drugs took effect. She couldn't feel anything. She could lie there and take it all. Or she could fight. She wasn't ready to die after all.
Get. Up. Hemera got herself to her hands and knees only to be taken down again and again. The group was cheering each other on. They were the worst kind of people...they were the reason this damn district was put up. It was them....all their fault....
Reaching down behind her, she pulled out her own common knife and flipped it open, slicing the first thing she could see clearly: someone's Achilles tendon. A howl of pain erupted and one person backed off. Do it again! She focused through the haze and targeted someone's calf. A sharp thrust and twist and she'd destroyed someone's calf muscle. The cries of hurt made her stronger, made her want to keep going. She was finally able to back herself away from the group by pushing herself back along the ground until her back hit the fountain. Using the raised ledge, she pulled herself up and steadied herself, staring the group down with a gaze of pure rage. "Get the fuck out of here before I kill you all," she yelled at them.
Seeing their prey fighting back made the group back off a few feet before those that could run turned around and did that very thing. Those that couldn't run got up and hobbled their way in the direction that they'd came. Once they were gone, Hemera sighed a breath of relief before moving towards the bench again. As she did so, she passed a good amount of blood spattered around the area. Her's mostly, she assumed. It couldn't be helped. The drugs were full force in her system. All she could do was sit back on that bench, pick up her bottle, and take another long swig. A cursory glance over her body showed a multitude of cuts through her clothes, all of which were bleeding. She could only guess what internal damage they had done. Laying back and staring at the near twilight sky, she rested her bottle back on the ground and closed her eyes. She was teetering between here and there, but she didn't care right now. At least the voices shut the fuck up.
She was death walking. From the outside, she appeared upkept. On the inside, her mind was numb, a barrage of questions and self-doubt attacking her nonstop. For the past few weeks, the thoughts had gotten worse, more depressing, more self-deprecating. It was sickening, but Hemera couldn't stop it. Nyka wasn't helping either. She kept adding her voice to the others, pointing out the flaws in her character, her strength....
'What friends do you have here? Who's actually going to listen to you and take you serious? You have no status here! You're a nobody. Nothing.'
Hemera kept walking, one foot in front of the other. A rattling could be heard in her pocket and in her hand was a paper bag clenched tightly. She had no idea where she was going. A cursory look simply told her that she had no idea where she was. She was better off in an alley somewhere, dead.
'Nobody wants anything to do with you. I don't even think that they know about you!' Nyka laughed and the sound reverberated through her skull. 'Do you really think that anybody wants anything to do with a weakling like you? If it wasn't for me, you would have died a long
time ago.'
"Shut up," Hemera whispered. The voices were growing ever louder, bouncing around with nowhere to go. Again and again the echoes came, driving her further down her mental rabbit hole. It wasn't as cold today, it seemed. She had pulled on some flared jeans and a bright pink tank top before she had left home, matching it with her combat boots. She had hoped the color would help some. What a funny thought that was, now that she thought about it.
Turning a corner, she was met with an open area that she assumed to be a small park. There was a fountain running in the center of it all, surrounded by benches and a few trees. A doggie bag station stood lonely amongst it all, a solitary bag waving at her as she passed it by. She threw herself onto a bench and lay down, loose hair mixing with the dirt on the ground. Again, Nyka spoke.
'What do you think you're going to do, sweet cheeks? Just ignore it all?'
"If that's what it takes, yeah," Hemera said out loud this time. She just wanted them all to go away for a while. Just a little bit. She wasn't ready for death. She was ready for relief. She sat up and pulled the neck of the hidden bottle from the bag and make quick work of the screw-on top. A quick swig later and she could feel the burn rushing down her throat. Tequila was her go to drink of the day. She reached in her pocket and pulled out the bottle of non-descriptive pills. They had been obtained when was running with her crew back then. The label had faded and could no longer be read by anyone. All she knew was she kept them in cases like this. Popping that top, she tipped it up and allowed a few pills to fall on her waiting tongue, only to be washed down with more tequila.
You're nothing....you'll never be anything...why do you even train? You haven't helped anyone. You can't fight. You think you do, but you don't. You deceive everyone around. You haven't even mentioned Nyka. You're ashamed of who you are, what you've become.
Another round of pills and liquor. She stared at the flowing fountain as the water cascaded from entrance to the pool below.
You should have been there with them. You shouldn't have survived. You should have died with your family. You should have died with your family.
Queue another round. Her foot slowly started tapping against the soft ground. Her brows furrowed in frustration. She just couldn't get them to go away.
What will you amount to? What will you help with in this new district? You're better off hiding from everything and everyone, tucking your tail between your legs like the dog that you are.
Round after round went until she was all out of the colored pills. Disgusted, she threw the bottle to the side and took a long drag out of the tequila bottle. How much did she have to take? How long did she have to endure this before she grew numb?
Not long after the thought, she could feel her nose and face begin to grow numb. Ah.....there we go. Finally, some relief. She sat back and threw her gaze to the sky. The sun had begun to set, it's rays throwing rose and orange colors throughout the vast expanse. The shadows had grown since she'd been here. How long had she been there for?
Another long drag.
What was her purpose here? What was she going to do here? She couldn't very well survive any longer on her own like this. She did have shelter, but what was she going to do for food? She shook her head viciously and looked straight up into the sky, resting an arm along the back of the wooden bench. Where would she go? She didn't have any friends here. She'd met Ayden and others, but she couldn't classify them as friends. Not yet at least. Hardly any of them had spoken to the poor, pitiful girl with snowy hair. Maybe she really was pathetic. Maybe she was a hindrance on society.
This time she pulled the bottle up and chugged it for a good ten seconds. That burn really did feel nice. She could feel her fingers and toes becoming numb now. Her extremities felt heavy, limp. It was then she heard a noise to her side and looked back down in that direction. Her vision was becoming blurred as well.
Standing there were a group of five, three males and two females. As they came out of the shadows, she could see various items being held. A pipe, some knives, a broken bottle...
"Hey chickie, how come you're all alone out here? Don't you know it's dangerous to be alone?" one of the guys called out, smirking. The group began their advance on her and Hemera put her bottle on the ground, moving to stand, only to grasp at the bench for support.
"Is it really any of your goddamn business why I'm out here, punk?" Hemera answered. She had begun to revert back to her old ways, back to the days in her thieving crew. This wasn't really a good time for fight, she knew it. She'd just have to hold out until they decided to leave. She took a deep breath and stood on her own, focusing on what was to come.
"You think you can talk to him that way?" said one of the girls, a defiant tone in her voice. "Do you know who he is, bitch?"
"I don't really care who he is, slut, but you better back off." Hemera began to crouch and immediately she could feel the effects of the drugs she'd put in her system. Her reflexes would be sluggish, her ability to watch their movements would be slowed...she wasn't in a good spot right now. The girl that had spoken spit on the ground and began to walk away from the ground towards her. Good. If she could fight them one on one, she had a chance.
As the girl grew closer, Hemera took her chances. She ran at the girl to gain momentum and surprise took over the girl's face. As she got closer, Hemera slid, taking the girl down with her and quickly climbed on top of her, delivering a swift right hook her face. Over and over she did this until she was certain the girl was down. She stood up and looked towards the group. Judging by their faces, they were pissed. Uh oh.
As Hemera tried to regroup, the rest of the flock attacked. The pipe connected with her shoulder, throwing her off balance and onto the ground. As she tried to scramble upwards, she was pinned by the others and she closed her eyes. So this was how it was going to end, huh? Still she struggled, pulling her upper body off the ground only to get it stomped on by someone's foot. A sharp pain tore across her face and she could feel a slow liquid begin to well and fall down her cheek. Someone grabbed her face and turned it to look at them. It was the first guy that had spoken, a grin lining his features. He looked like he hadn't taken care of himself in weeks...didn't smell like it either.
"How are you going to get out of this one, bitch?" He pulled a fist back and slammed it against her temple, head ricocheting back only to connect with the ground. Stars lined her vision and it dimmed. This really wasn't good. Looking back up, she directed a murderous gaze at the male and spit at his face.
"Do what you want. I won't let you do it willingly. You've got to fight for your victory."
Anger took over his face and he stepped off of her, saying, "Destroy her." After that, the only thing Hemera knew was pain. Kicks were directed at her, connecting with her abdomen and chest, slices were being made along her body. A few punches were mingled in with it all. Until finally, the drugs took effect. She couldn't feel anything. She could lie there and take it all. Or she could fight. She wasn't ready to die after all.
Get. Up. Hemera got herself to her hands and knees only to be taken down again and again. The group was cheering each other on. They were the worst kind of people...they were the reason this damn district was put up. It was them....all their fault....
Reaching down behind her, she pulled out her own common knife and flipped it open, slicing the first thing she could see clearly: someone's Achilles tendon. A howl of pain erupted and one person backed off. Do it again! She focused through the haze and targeted someone's calf. A sharp thrust and twist and she'd destroyed someone's calf muscle. The cries of hurt made her stronger, made her want to keep going. She was finally able to back herself away from the group by pushing herself back along the ground until her back hit the fountain. Using the raised ledge, she pulled herself up and steadied herself, staring the group down with a gaze of pure rage. "Get the fuck out of here before I kill you all," she yelled at them.
Seeing their prey fighting back made the group back off a few feet before those that could run turned around and did that very thing. Those that couldn't run got up and hobbled their way in the direction that they'd came. Once they were gone, Hemera sighed a breath of relief before moving towards the bench again. As she did so, she passed a good amount of blood spattered around the area. Her's mostly, she assumed. It couldn't be helped. The drugs were full force in her system. All she could do was sit back on that bench, pick up her bottle, and take another long swig. A cursory glance over her body showed a multitude of cuts through her clothes, all of which were bleeding. She could only guess what internal damage they had done. Laying back and staring at the near twilight sky, she rested her bottle back on the ground and closed her eyes. She was teetering between here and there, but she didn't care right now. At least the voices shut the fuck up.
